Tomorrow we have the 20 week scan!
Already I must have been asked at least 20 times if we know what we’re having. It seems to be the first question people ask when they discover that you’re pregnant (or let’s face it, notice your huge belly!).
I remember by the end of my last pregnancy, I’d had enough of explaining why I didn’t want to find out! I was going to get a top printed with ‘I don’t know what I’m having’ on it!! Yet I do exactly the same when chatting to a pregnant woman! Must remember in future how annoying it can be!
So, last time, we didn’t find out. I wanted the excitement on the day of birth, after going through the agony of labour, and thought it might also give me an extra push to get the bugger (I mean my gorgeous little bundle) out! I also didn’t really think there would be massive advantage to knowing. Most people that I’ve spoken to that did found out say they did so due to impatience and not being able to wait until the day. Only a few state it was to make things easier in getting ready for the baby. With Ella, I just bought some white babygrows that she lived in for her first week in hospital, by which time presents of cute girly clothes started to be gifted to us. And I loved being able to go out and buy outfits for her, with her in tow!
If I was being really really honest, if I could pick last time, I’d have admitted I wanted a girl slightly more than a boy. I wouldn’t have cared any less if it was a boy. There would have been no disappointment. But if there was some weird system where you had to pick one over the other to have, I’d have gone for girl. All my daydreams about being a mum included a girl baby. No idea why! I love boys too!
And a girl it was!
This time? I have literally no preference whatsoever! I’d really struggle to pick if I had to.
There are huge advantages to both. If it’s a girl, then she’ll be close in age to Ella and she can wear Ella’s old clothes, and they’ll hopefully get on great and be best mates for ever!
If it’s a boy, we’ll have one of each, it will be a new experience to bringing up a girl, and of course they’ll still be able to play together and hopefully be great mates too!
I can’t say for sure whether this will be our last baby. It’s hard to know that until you’ve experienced having two kids I think! I can’t abide the idea of another pregnancy, but at the same time two babies doesn’t quite feel enough to me, so who knows!! But I know, if we do have a girl, I’ll never ‘chase a boy’, keeping going until we have a lad.
So, are we going to find out this time? Well, we did toy with the idea for about an hour. Then I imagined being in that small dark room, with my big gut covered in jelly, Sean sat in a plastic chair to the side, and being told the gender of our child, and it just didn’t feel right. I want to know when it’s out, when it’s there, when I can cuddle it, when we’re full of joy that the baby is here, and when there is already so much happiness going on in that room.
So, no need to ask now. NO WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT WE ARE HAVING!!!