As I write this, I’ve just about stopped shaking…
Ella likes to run. She loves to be free.
She’s also defiant and enjoys winding you up by running the wrong way!!
She’s always been fine walking along roadsides. She either holds on to the pram or trundles alongside me.
Today, that wasn’t the case.
We’d just come out of soft play. Ella ran the wrong way. I shouted her back and she got that defiant look on her face, turned and ran. So I ran after her. She was getting closer and closer to the road and I still wasn’t near enough. I was screaming her name by this point and telling her to stop.
She ran straight out in to the road.
I don’t really know what happened next but someone started shouting ‘the baby’. The pram was tipping. Ella’s in the road, the pram is falling over. Both girls in danger.
It’s a bit of a blackout in my memory but a guy grabbed Ella as I righted the pram. I was shaking all over. No one was hurt.
He sat me down outside his cafe and brought me some cold water as I calmed down.
I feel awful that either of these two things could happen, let alone at the same time.
I feel like a bad parent. I feel I let them both down in my responsibility to keep them safe.
And I learnt that I am foolish to trust Ella near roads. From now on, reins will be used. There will be tears and tantrums but I can not put her in danger again. Running free is now restricted to open spaces!!